Written During a Particularly Boring Meeting

In a perfect Metal world The Red Album by Baroness would have been #1 instead of #5 in Decibel Magazines Top 40 Metal Albums of 2007. Of course, in a perfect Metal world "Master of Puppets" would be our National Anthem and TRL would have special drop in's by Opeth and High on Fire.

Elsewhere on the list are many of the usual culprits, some of which I agree with (Watain, Jesu), some of which I don't (Dillinger Escape Plan, Darkest Hour), and some of which I have no clue about (Melt Banana? WTF?). But that's what makes list making so fun - there's always a great argument/discussion/fist fight to be had.

Since the subjects I have up in the cranium would take too much effort for my sleep-deprived brain to get down with any sense of clarity (Jack is currently 2 days into a massive teething/no sleep/screaming frenzy), I thought I'd make up a quick list or two about whatever comes into my head. A little (though not as good) in the vein of Reforming Slacker's sweet post from a few days ago (and lately she's been on a run of extremely interesting, intelligent posts). So to kick things off, here's the first list:

6 Things That Give Me Comfort at My Desk

1. My Mini Library - I always keep a short stack of go-to books on my shelf for those "just in case" moments, like when I forget to bring my current book from home, if I need some inspiration, or if I just want to goof off a bit. Right now the shelf has my tiny leather-bound copy of The Complete Works of Shakespeare, Walt Whitman's Leaves of Grass, the City Lights Pocket Poets Anthology, the I Ching, and my trusty college copy of Strunk and White's Elements of Style.

2. Miles Davis' Milestones on Cassette - Even though the cassette player on my little $29.99 neon blue mini boom box is broken, I can't bear to part with my worn and stretched copy of Milestones. It leans comfortably against the wall, looking at me and telling me that it's all cool, and those cats can't bring you down.

3. The Missus in Montreal - Even though I have a couple wedding pictures resting on my desk, the picture I look at the most is a tiny portrait of the Missus tacked to the wall immediately to the left of my monitor, right in between the Tiny Masters of Today pin and Kids in the Hall postcard. We were in Montreal with some friends, and in a fit of humor I whipped out my camera and said "Give me sexy!" She responded with a hair flip that I somehow captured perfectly, She hates it, but it's one of my favorite pictures of her.

4. The Voss Cork - I think by now everyone knows about Voss Water (no relation - I don't see a dime), but far less well-known is Voss Wine (no relation - I don't see a dime). We shared a bottle with some friends while in California and I saved the cork, which is always close at hand when the need for some serious fidgeting arises.

5. My Napoleon Dynamite Bobble-Head - He used to be paired with my Kip Bobble-Head, but Kip was decapitated during the Commercial Truck Pilots of 2007, and was sadly lost. When I need consensus on something, I'll tap the top of Napoleon's head. When I'm looking for a dissenting view, I'll slap his cheek. Then I'll weep silently.

6. Smaelg - Smaelg hides under my desk in a box next to the recycling bin. I reserve Smaelg for special occasions, typically occasions involving irritating people. Those people get to see Smaelg's eyes, and maybe a flash of his slick, razor-sharp jaws before the end.